Today I bought myself a new flower essence, California Wild Rose.

I don't normally take only a single essence. Usually I create a blend of several. But when I read this in one of my books today, I knew what I wanted to do:

California Wild Rose is among the most beautiful and fundamental of flower remedies, for it helps the soul to incarnate and really take hold of its responsibilities and tasks on Earth. ... The ability to really care and give oneself to life, to others, and to the Earth characterizes a truly loving soul. Many souls hold back or hesitate, not wanting to experience the pain or challenge of life on Earth. ... California Wild Rose is a very beneficial remedy for all stages of the life biography, and can be particularly helpful... when the soul most especially longs to find its positive ideals, and seeks to serve the world through its life calling or vocation. California Wild Rose stimulates the love forces of the heart, so that the soul finds enthusiasm for earthly life, worldly tasks and human relationships.

Now it seems to me that I'm already doing a lot of that already, so much better than I ever have before in life. And yet, something about this essence calls to me.

I know part of it: the part about holding back. In my last coaching session I finally spoke to this. I said, "I find myself holding back, even with you. I hold back my skill, my competence. I have tons of my own tools to do the homework you've asked me to do, and I didn't say anything. And I think I could have done this exercise so much faster at home with no one watching. But I bumble through it here dumbing it down, pretending to be less than I am."

And he said, "Of course... if we put on a mask and people reject it, we're still safe."

Another way I hold back is with my physicality. I've always wanted to be "the touchy feely type". Instead I hold back, and I'd like to let go of that. I think I will set the intention to touch you more. Get ready for it :-D